1. Being 6 cents short to buy one song on iTunes.
2. When people don't listen.
3. That sound that old people can't hear.
4. Twilight.
5. Girls my age that dress like prostitutes.
6. That "Everybody Knows You Cried Last Night" is about prostitutes so I can't do it for my English song project.
7. My feet.
8. PMS. Yep, I went there.*
9. When it's freaking April 30 and it's still not warm and sunny.
10. Being too lazy to go eat something.
11. When the "Large Brew Size" Keurig cups only fill up about 3/4 of a regular mug.
12. When white kids try to be "gangsta".
13. People who just don't get it.
14. Being confused about whether or not my letters of recomendation actually made it to the zoo or not.
15. Not knowing if I spelled "recomendation" right. Which I'm pretty sure I didn't.
16. Not being able to spell anymore.
17. That the AP Gov national exam is in less than 2 weeks.
18. When somebody drops an ice cube on the floor and then I step on it in my socks.
19. When my socks don't slide on the kitchen floor.
20. Ruffles.
21. Potato chips.
22. People who try way too hard to be cool.
23. Thinking of something first, and then someone else does it and then when you do it it looks like you copied that person and nobody knows that you had the idea first.
24. Knowing that the above is probably a very mangled and confusing sentence.
25. Having way too many things I hate and having to stop here so nobody thinks I'm crazy.
*I don't actually have PMS right now. I just hate it.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Why Girls Have it Better
After my dissappointingly crappy post yesterday (as in, immediately after I wrote it) I began to think of ways to redeem myself. I'd been reading cracked.com articles for about two hours, which really kind of gets creative juices flowing. For those of you who are familiar with Cracked, you may think I'm off my rocker a bit. For those of you who are not, I direct thee here. Excuse the mild language and sexual references, because behind that are some seriously funny articles written by sardonic people that make the subjects interesting. So anyway, for today's post, I was inspired by an article about video games (here). It was saying how one reason it's not cool to be a gamer is that they're marketed towards 17-year-old douchebags, in that some of them are filled with lite porn and sexual references. I agree. I mean, seriously, you've all seen the commercials. That right there is objectifying women, I thought. And then, it hit me. What about the men? Sure, they don't get passed off as sew objects, but women really do have it a heck of a lot easier in some cases. Here's why, mostly pertaining to teenage boys.
1. Bathing suits. Sure, you've all seen the girls on the beach in skanky bikinis, showing off their goods. But at least we have a choice to wear a one piece or a tankini or something less promiscuous. Girls choose to strip down that far. So here's my point: guys have one style of bathing suit. Every single person reading this has seen the fat kid on the beach or at the pool who just does not look good with his shirt off. But that poor kid has no choice in the matter. There's no bathing suit for men that covers up his substantial girth, and if he wears a t-shirt he'll get made fun of. He has no choice but to wear something he probably feels uncomfortable in.
2. Skin. When puberty hits you like a wrecking ball, your face breaks out like a mad prisoner from a jail cell. Thankfully for girls, we have all this awesome stuff called makeup that hides the blemishes. Guys do not have makeup. If guys wear makeup and people notice, they get ripped on for being gay when all they were trying to do was cover up some of that nasty acne. You know the kind of nasty acne I'm talking about. It sucks. And boys can't just cover it up with cover-up.
3. Height. This one just kind of sucks, because there's not anything anyone can do about it. That wrecking ball hits all the girls first, so they get taller and fill out while the boys are left short little gangly things that still sound like Mickey Mouse.
4. Individuality. Girls can get away with dressing off the norm, not doing sports, and otherwise being different. If a guy tries to dress differently than everyone else, people assume he's gay. Or just weird. If a guy isn't into sports, he's a dork or a geek and people pay less attention to him. Boys have a far narrower margin as to what is accepted as normal and okay.
5. Support. We ladies have armies upon armies of people lined up to get us through our teen and young adult years. There are piles of magazines and websites out there for women that are filled to the brim with advice on romance and fashion and health. Um, HELLO? Where's the Seventeen for guys?? Are they not allowed to have problems or something? Are they expected to just deal with their issues and pretend they're not confused about everything? That's why it's up to us girls to casually dish out the tips. At least, that's what I think. Who else is going to tell them that their hair looks good like that or that color looks nice on him?
There you have it, folks. Hard proof that girls are better. Or at least have it better. Same thing.
1. Bathing suits. Sure, you've all seen the girls on the beach in skanky bikinis, showing off their goods. But at least we have a choice to wear a one piece or a tankini or something less promiscuous. Girls choose to strip down that far. So here's my point: guys have one style of bathing suit. Every single person reading this has seen the fat kid on the beach or at the pool who just does not look good with his shirt off. But that poor kid has no choice in the matter. There's no bathing suit for men that covers up his substantial girth, and if he wears a t-shirt he'll get made fun of. He has no choice but to wear something he probably feels uncomfortable in.
2. Skin. When puberty hits you like a wrecking ball, your face breaks out like a mad prisoner from a jail cell. Thankfully for girls, we have all this awesome stuff called makeup that hides the blemishes. Guys do not have makeup. If guys wear makeup and people notice, they get ripped on for being gay when all they were trying to do was cover up some of that nasty acne. You know the kind of nasty acne I'm talking about. It sucks. And boys can't just cover it up with cover-up.
3. Height. This one just kind of sucks, because there's not anything anyone can do about it. That wrecking ball hits all the girls first, so they get taller and fill out while the boys are left short little gangly things that still sound like Mickey Mouse.
4. Individuality. Girls can get away with dressing off the norm, not doing sports, and otherwise being different. If a guy tries to dress differently than everyone else, people assume he's gay. Or just weird. If a guy isn't into sports, he's a dork or a geek and people pay less attention to him. Boys have a far narrower margin as to what is accepted as normal and okay.
5. Support. We ladies have armies upon armies of people lined up to get us through our teen and young adult years. There are piles of magazines and websites out there for women that are filled to the brim with advice on romance and fashion and health. Um, HELLO? Where's the Seventeen for guys?? Are they not allowed to have problems or something? Are they expected to just deal with their issues and pretend they're not confused about everything? That's why it's up to us girls to casually dish out the tips. At least, that's what I think. Who else is going to tell them that their hair looks good like that or that color looks nice on him?
There you have it, folks. Hard proof that girls are better. Or at least have it better. Same thing.
Monday, April 25, 2011
I have Easter hangover.
My head hurts and stuff. So, I'm not really totally in the mood to blog currently. However, I don't have school tomorrow, which is really cool. I'm gonna go shower and go to bed and hopefully feel better tomorrow. Enjoy this picture of a knitted Snooki that I added to make this look longer. Kinda cute, huh? If you're still looking for something to do because you're bored so you decided to read this, check out cracked.com or something.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Buzz.
Good morning, all. It's 7:36 a.m., and I am happy as a clam in pajamas. There is a large mug of coffee to my right, Easter breakfast at church is in the very near future, and today will be filled with food and family and hopefully fun. There are also three teenage boys sleeping in my living room. There were four teenage boys sleeping in my living room, but one of them (my brother, that is) had to go play his bass at another church. Ahem. Loser. Ahem. My stomach is growling, and I am picturing the heaps of bacon and eggs and toast and other breakfast-y things I will soon be consuming. Actually, I'm not totally sure of the fare, having never been driven enough to get up extra early on Easter Sunday to go eat breakfast. But I'm excited. It's all cool. There will be a family gathering later on, which will most likely involve Grandma's cheesy hashbrowns. Yeah, I really need to start running. Thankfully, I'll see my aunt today and we'll discuss training for the impending cross country season. I will try very hard to pay utmost attention to the sermon this morning, but my brain is already soaking up the coffee like an enormous pink sponge. (Did you also catch that subtle hint that my brain is enormous? wink wink). I officially have nothing better to do other than this, but I'm kind of out of things to say. My brother's *cough cough* "girlfriend" still isn't his girlfriend, even after Prom. I have yet to find the camera he borrowed from me to take pictures. I'm just going to sit here staring at the screen until my dad is ready to go. And maybe I'll pee. That coffee really is going right through me. And I'll write a sentence when inspiration strikes. I still haven't done any of my homework. That might be a problem. I'm not actually sure how large this family gathering will be, seeing as apparently most of my family is out of town. I guess we'll see. It might just be my branch and my grandma. Yep. I suppose we'll figure it out. Now I'm kind of wondering when the teenage boys in my living room are getting up and going home. Awwwww, my coffee is gone. Now comes the serious question: am I desperate enough to drink crappy church coffee? That really depends. Ooh, I here the stirring of teenagers. Okay, well, I'm actually going to stop typing these sentences of randomness and get my butt out of this chair to go find some suitable shoes. Happy Easter, all.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
My Mom is Cool.
Apparently my video game haze did not last as long as I figured. I'm having some trouble wording this, to be honest, and I'm not totally sure why. Perhaps my brain is slowly shutting down, repeatedly slamming on the "SLEEP, YOU IDIOT!" button. It's okay, though, because tomorrow, for the first time in forty days, I will be drinking coffee. I'll probably be in a caffeine craze for most of the day, Easter-ing it up at top speed. It's an exciting prospect.
Today's post comes to you in two parts. Part one: a summary of my day so far. Part two: a movie review. Yes, that rhymes. I'm a poet and I didn't even know it, and all that crap.
After being rescued from the clutches of two six year olds and Lego Batman, my mom and I spent a significant amount of time driving around downtown. Unintentionally, of course. Basically every street in the downtown area is one-way, so if you can't find a parking spot or forget that you have to deposit the checks, you could find yourself driving around in circles for a while. All that driving was famishing, so we got some fast food and then stopped at the car wash to get the van cleaned for my brother's Prom. We had a small picnic on the grass island outside Quality and talked about education and diversity. My mother and I always seem to fall into intellectual conversations with each other, whether we mean to or not. When the car was significantly cleaner, we came home and she went shopping. My brother's friends came over to get ready, and they were just as bad as all my friends getting ready for a dance. At one point, one of them came dashing up the stairs yelling for me and asking for safety pins. I thought it was pretty hilarious. We took pictures in the park by the lake, where it was windy and cold and I felt bad for all the girls in their strappy dresses. But it was a success, and my mom and I went to see a movie after, which brings me to part two.
Water for Elephants. This is a book that I read in entirety in a single day. Thankfully, the movie was not dissappointing. The plot points and characters were somewhat rearranged, but everything managed to fall into place in the end much like the book did. No spoilers here, I promise. I was really impressed with the actors. Honestly, I was a little dubious about Robert Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon, but they were actually pretty fantastic. I swear it was the best I've ever seen Robert Pattinson act. And look, for that matter, but we won't go there. There's something very old-Hollywood about Reese Witherspoon, too, which totally worked for the role. Overall, I'd give it about a four out of five stars.
Alright, I guess I should listen to the button-pushers in my head now. G'night.
Today's post comes to you in two parts. Part one: a summary of my day so far. Part two: a movie review. Yes, that rhymes. I'm a poet and I didn't even know it, and all that crap.
After being rescued from the clutches of two six year olds and Lego Batman, my mom and I spent a significant amount of time driving around downtown. Unintentionally, of course. Basically every street in the downtown area is one-way, so if you can't find a parking spot or forget that you have to deposit the checks, you could find yourself driving around in circles for a while. All that driving was famishing, so we got some fast food and then stopped at the car wash to get the van cleaned for my brother's Prom. We had a small picnic on the grass island outside Quality and talked about education and diversity. My mother and I always seem to fall into intellectual conversations with each other, whether we mean to or not. When the car was significantly cleaner, we came home and she went shopping. My brother's friends came over to get ready, and they were just as bad as all my friends getting ready for a dance. At one point, one of them came dashing up the stairs yelling for me and asking for safety pins. I thought it was pretty hilarious. We took pictures in the park by the lake, where it was windy and cold and I felt bad for all the girls in their strappy dresses. But it was a success, and my mom and I went to see a movie after, which brings me to part two.
Water for Elephants. This is a book that I read in entirety in a single day. Thankfully, the movie was not dissappointing. The plot points and characters were somewhat rearranged, but everything managed to fall into place in the end much like the book did. No spoilers here, I promise. I was really impressed with the actors. Honestly, I was a little dubious about Robert Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon, but they were actually pretty fantastic. I swear it was the best I've ever seen Robert Pattinson act. And look, for that matter, but we won't go there. There's something very old-Hollywood about Reese Witherspoon, too, which totally worked for the role. Overall, I'd give it about a four out of five stars.
Alright, I guess I should listen to the button-pushers in my head now. G'night.
Friday, April 22, 2011
I Have Officially Become a Teenager
Why? Well, it's two years into my teen-dom, and I've finally played legit video games. As in Black Ops. Which I play horrendously. My friend's six year old brother plays better than me. So here I am, in the comfort of her house (sitting in a moon chair, of course), watching as they play Black Ops. I've discovered that I totally pwn at dorkier games of the Lego Harry Potter variety, but perhaps my skill comes from watching Hank and Katherine play it on Youtube. For those of you who don't know who I'm talking about, I direct you here. I also am freakin' awesome at Lego Star Wars, which probably comes from watching my brother play. Other than that, I dance like a total geeky white girl on Dance Central.
I've also wrestled the six year old and lightsaber fought him. Soooo....there. Yep. I'll most likely be sleep deprived tomorrow, so this may be the last post for a bit here. This weekend is not the best for me to have a load and a half of homework to do. Anywho. Goodbye for now.
I've also wrestled the six year old and lightsaber fought him. Soooo....there. Yep. I'll most likely be sleep deprived tomorrow, so this may be the last post for a bit here. This weekend is not the best for me to have a load and a half of homework to do. Anywho. Goodbye for now.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
My iPod helps me survive the Zombie Apocalypse
Inspired, once again, by HayleyGHoover of The Hayleylujah Chorus, I decided to play the zombie game.
--Pause briefly while I go locate my iPod, a key player in this game--
Alrighty. Let's lay down the law: go grab your iPod and put it on shuffle. Every song that comes up is part of your Zombie Apocalypse soundtrack.
1. The overall theme for the apocalypse:
MMMBop by Hanson. This is going to be one heck of a ride.
2. The song that plays when I kill my first zombie:
I'll Make a Man Out of You from Mulan. YEEESSSSSS!!!! It knows what it's doing, I swear.
3. The song that plays while I'm being chased by a horde:
Not Meant to Be by Theory of a Deadman. Okay...that one's a stretch. Maybe. Maybe I'm Not Meant to Be dead. See? There.
4. When I kill my loved one:
Only the Young by Journey. That's quite the upbeat song to kill my loved one to. And here I sit, running it through my head, trying to find a single lyric that could possibly go along with this.
5. When I find a group of survivors:
My Girl's Ex-Boyfriend by Relient K. Number 2's comment is becoming increasingly untrue.
6. When I meet my new love interest:
Put Your Records On by Corinne Bailey Rae. Okay, I could see that.
7. When I make my final stand:
Fix You by Coldplay. Iiiiinteresting.
8. When I think I've survived it all:
Walk This Way by Aerosmith. Oddly enough, I can kinda see this one. Like "Oh, yeah, walk this way, freakin' zombie! Yeah! Yeah! Not so bad after all, huh, son?! Just don't kiss me!"
9. When I discover a bite mark on me:
I Don't Wanna Be by Gavin DeGraw. That one actually fits pretty perfectly.
10. The song during the end credits:
Complicated by Avril Lavigne. That's a keeper.
So there you have it. Even if I am killed by zombies, at least it'll have some good music to it.
Otherness: I finished Water for Elephants today. And by finished it today, I mean I read pretty much the whole thing today. It was spectacular.
Also, I was sick, which gave me plenty of time to do it. I also watched some Modern Family and some Glee reruns. And Celebrity Jeopardy from SNL. I think that's it. Ok. Sooo. Yeah.
I hope you LOL'd a little while reading this. Is LOL'd redundant? Or does it just not make sense? I think it just doesn't make sense. So instead of saving time and abbreviating, which has just caused me to be all confused and stuff, I'll just conclude by saying I hope you laughed out loud a little. There. I know I did.
Also, you can find HayleyG's list here.
--Pause briefly while I go locate my iPod, a key player in this game--
Alrighty. Let's lay down the law: go grab your iPod and put it on shuffle. Every song that comes up is part of your Zombie Apocalypse soundtrack.
1. The overall theme for the apocalypse:
MMMBop by Hanson. This is going to be one heck of a ride.
2. The song that plays when I kill my first zombie:
I'll Make a Man Out of You from Mulan. YEEESSSSSS!!!! It knows what it's doing, I swear.
3. The song that plays while I'm being chased by a horde:
Not Meant to Be by Theory of a Deadman. Okay...that one's a stretch. Maybe. Maybe I'm Not Meant to Be dead. See? There.
4. When I kill my loved one:
Only the Young by Journey. That's quite the upbeat song to kill my loved one to. And here I sit, running it through my head, trying to find a single lyric that could possibly go along with this.
5. When I find a group of survivors:
My Girl's Ex-Boyfriend by Relient K. Number 2's comment is becoming increasingly untrue.
6. When I meet my new love interest:
Put Your Records On by Corinne Bailey Rae. Okay, I could see that.
7. When I make my final stand:
Fix You by Coldplay. Iiiiinteresting.
8. When I think I've survived it all:
Walk This Way by Aerosmith. Oddly enough, I can kinda see this one. Like "Oh, yeah, walk this way, freakin' zombie! Yeah! Yeah! Not so bad after all, huh, son?! Just don't kiss me!"
9. When I discover a bite mark on me:
I Don't Wanna Be by Gavin DeGraw. That one actually fits pretty perfectly.
10. The song during the end credits:
Complicated by Avril Lavigne. That's a keeper.
So there you have it. Even if I am killed by zombies, at least it'll have some good music to it.
Otherness: I finished Water for Elephants today. And by finished it today, I mean I read pretty much the whole thing today. It was spectacular.
Also, I was sick, which gave me plenty of time to do it. I also watched some Modern Family and some Glee reruns. And Celebrity Jeopardy from SNL. I think that's it. Ok. Sooo. Yeah.
I hope you LOL'd a little while reading this. Is LOL'd redundant? Or does it just not make sense? I think it just doesn't make sense. So instead of saving time and abbreviating, which has just caused me to be all confused and stuff, I'll just conclude by saying I hope you laughed out loud a little. There. I know I did.
Also, you can find HayleyG's list here.
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